I tried VB’s perfume and threw my Le Labo in the bin

‘Eau de laborious work’. 

If notorious on-line perfume persona Jeremy Fragrance has taught me something, it’s {that a} good scent is all about “energy!”. Not that I’ve ever adhered to this rule – my perfume assortment is comprised of both low cost, candy spray-on (a homage to Impulse, if you’ll) or no matter’s fashionable and inoffensive to my nostrils. 
This is as a result of I don’t discover selecting a perfume to be a very choosy course of (blasphemous, I know!). Same with films – if there’s romance, massive quantities of on-line hype or a spontaneous dance quantity, I’ll most likely get pleasure from it.

We like nosy individuals. Don’t be shy, head to our Beauty part for extra. 

It’s good to be discerning in some areas of your life (tattoos, clothes, your intrinsic ethical compass) nevertheless it’s additionally good to offer in to the factor everybody else likes and let all of it wash over you. No ideas, head empty. Brain {smooth}.
And being the smooth-brained Melbourne Northside sheep I am, I personal a bottle of Le Labo’s Santal 33. The perfume of nepotism infants, ambiguous artistic freelancers and underground DJs in all places, Santal 33 completely coats the nostrils of all Brunswick-adjacent residents. 
The irony of me saying I’m not a very discerning fragrance-chooser and proudly owning a $296 bottle of smelly water doesn’t escape me. I’m a girl of thriller; I wish to maintain individuals guessing (which is why you could find all of my embarrassing confessions on the web, revealed long-form). Also, my Santal 33 bottle is coming to an finish and I can’t afford one other. 
So when it got here time to decide on a brand new perfume, it wanted to be very low cost and additionally highly effective, as a result of Jeremy Fragrance mentioned so. I do personal Hello Kitty Bubblegum Body Spray, however that’s the unsuitable form of highly effective. So what did I select? Only Australia’s fastest-selling perfume ever, hun. 
Embodying the ‘very essence of laborious work’, VB Thirst is the first-ever scent from iconique beer model, Victoria Bitter. Yes, it’s a far cry from Le Labo’s signature mix of “sandalwood, cedarwood, cardamom, iris, violet and ambrox”, however it is going to take you from the worksite to the pub, which is at all times helpful.
It was surprisingly tough to get my grubby mitts on a bottle of this ale perfume. I know I simply mentioned it was the fastest-selling perfume ever, however I reside in a world of delusion (for those who haven’t figured that out already). After trotting in and out of Chemist Warehouses throughout inner-city Melbourne, I lastly discovered the ‘Longneck’ number of this gorgina scent. The ‘Stubby’ was offered out in all places, the safety guard knowledgeable me, so I needed to go along with its longer cousin. More beer perfume for me!
As VB ambassador Harley Breen mentioned, “Thirst is a scent that each man can get round. It will make you wanna sniff your mate after a full day on the instruments.” Thankfully, I love nothing greater than sniffing my mates! Eager for the ladies to get below my pits, I opened the field and eliminated the brown-and-gold bottle from its packaging. 
The bottle genuinely simply seems to be like a VB beer, so there’s not rather more to say re the design aesthetic. It smells surprisingly refreshing, like a extra bitter, beer-forward model of Acqua Di Gio. While most of my cheaper perfumes odor like a toddler picked them out, this has a extra salt-of-the-earth bloke-ness to it, which is cute.
It is likely to be a scent the tomboy queen herself Kendall Jenner wears, or a perfume you layer below one thing slightly sweeter. This scent is a nod to your interior bogan, a evident rejection of all that’s fashionable (which makes it very cool and area of interest). It smells like forgetting your sneakers in a buying centre, ingesting moscato by a straw or watching Kath and Kim on the telly.  
It’s additionally good as a result of if anybody scrunches their nostril and asks “What’s that odor?” you possibly can simply reply with “Your dad”. So now that your AirPods are in the incinerator, I’m declaring Le Labo is out, and hoppy, masculine fragrances are in. If you’re hesitant to throw your Santal 33 in the bin, you could possibly go away a bottle of it at your native pub as a substitute. I hear the bogs get smelly typically.*
*For clarification, this text is satire. I don’t anticipate anybody to bin something.
To get your individual waft of masculinity, head right here.


Recommended For You

About the Author: Jessica