Skincare tips for the summer heat

PHOTO: The Creative Exchange / Unsplash
By: Paige Riding, Copy Editor
 
Tip #1: “Open” your pores with steam
You can’t. You can’t open your pores. That’s not how they work. They don’t have muscle mass or something, weirdo.
You can, nevertheless, save your self the utter agony of turning on an oven on this heat. Boil some water on the range and open up that good, good Kraft Dinner field, child. 
Lean over the pot. Let the steam hit your face for no motive. Feel even hotter. Regret taking skincare recommendation from an individual who checks commas for a dwelling. 
Wow, you’re glowing! Ah, nope, that’s the neon orange cheese reflecting off your sweaty brow.
 
Tip #2: Try a mud masks
Whatever you do, don’t go into the backyard. You thought I’d steer you that mistaken? I’d by no means ask you to place such filth in your attractive mug. (I thought of it. Really, I did. The mud was dried out.)
For the finest impact, you’ll have to go to the most slug-infested marshy space you’ll find. Pick up a whopping handful of brown gunk you possibly can solely pray is mud, understand this can be a God-awful thought, and go make your self an ice-cold mudslide as an alternative. No, the sugar gained’t make you escape. Neither will the alcohol. Don’t fear about it. Please.
 
Tip #3: Just cease sweating
It’s not laborious?
 
Tip #4: Don’t overlook sunscreen
People who brag about by no means utilizing sunscreen are the similar individuals who refuse to make use of the air dryers after washing their palms in a public restroom as a result of they “take too lengthy.” They simply waltz out, dripping water all over the place. You’re sick. Sick and twisted. 
Anyway, this piece of recommendation isn’t a joke. As a lately graduated English main trying for a job in a pandemic, I do know a joke after I see one. Just placed on sunblock.

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About the Author: Jessica